"Work hard, play hard" this is what I always tell my kids. Yesterday that's what I did- I worked hard to get my reward at the end of the day. It was Thursday, I was exhausted, but I pushed through knowing that at 8:00 when everyone was in bed I could plop on the couch & watch the 3 TV shows that I enjoy guilt free. At 10:30 my TV comma was interrupted by our sick little Bella crying. After she went back to sleep, I finished the last 10 minutes of my medical drama, which ended in a preemie baby dying, me bawling & my foggy head drifting off to dreams of a better world before it hit the pillow. At 1:30 a.m. when my lovely dream world was shattered with cries from my sweet baby, the memories of that preemie dying came rushing back & I welcomed her hugs, held her a little longer, told her in my mind how much I loved her more intensely. At 3:30 my tired mind & body were less sentimental, but I went in and hugged her because I know how hard it is to sleep with a stuffy nose. At 5:00 I sighed & threw the pillow over my head. For a moment I dreamt of putting on a cute matching workout suit & going to the gym, trading in my droopy boobs for the perky version, hitting my husband to wake up in the middle of the night for something other than filling the humidifier, and a massage. Do all those people who say they get massages on face book really get them? Really? I want a massage. Instead I try not to hit a wall as I wobble across the hall into Bella's room for what feels like the hundredth time. At 6:30 I finally just bring her to bed with me & she was actually falling back to sleep...and so was I...then, "MOMMY IS IT MORNIN'?" I crack open one eye & look at the clock. 7:01 a.m. "Yes Sam, I guess it is". Let the party begin. Within seconds, there is a bright light, the theme song to "Umi Zoomie" blaring & kids jumping on me. I lay there starring at the ceiling realizing the only exercise I'm probably going to get today is running up the stairs 20 times to fetch chocolate milk & bring up laundry. If I do get dressed, I better wear my padded bra. And that massage I dreamed about? Whatever. I'm just whining.
2 comments:
I loved this post so much. How truuuuue it is. You poor thing. But it's only proof of how good of a mother you are! The fact that you get up every time to calm her is a good sign. Means you're an excellent mama.
This post made me laugh and almost cry! I wish I was closer and could give you a hand on days like that! I have had times and thoughts like that! Bless your heart that you can laugh about it! You are a gem Laura! You inspire me and I LOVE you!!
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